I should drink three red bulls and stay up 30+ hours more often. I cleaned out my MP3 player and added my finally organized audio books. I washed the drain pan and did the dishes. I cleaned my room, which was so bad I had been straining on tiptoe to get anything from the closet. If I don’t crash I might give the dog a bath and go to the store.
I haven’t been this productive in months.
So I actually told my psych doc about how I haven’t been sleeping and the nightmares and all of it, so he gave me some extra strength something or another and I slept for 14 hours AND DONT FEEL HORRIBLE WHAt iS THIS?!?!
It was like anytime i slept, even for an hour, I woke up more depressed an miserable, and that didn’t happen, and I’m so relieved I could cry.
Mwahahahaha, I’ve been drinking red bull instead of sleeping for a week and I’m about to go see my psych doc in a chemically induced fake mania because this is the only way I’ve been able to feel happy or get dressed or vaguely tolerate being around other people.
I saw a guy carrying a kitten in Walmart.
Also had my first red bull and I’m going to go back and buy ten cases because while I can’t quite remember, I’m pretty sure this is what happy used to feel like.